Self Improvement Tips

  There is a song by the musical group, Alabama, “I’m in a Hurry.” All of us appear to be in a hurry. Is that something that benefits us?  At times we are in a season of hurriedness. That is understandable.  But, if your whole life is that way I suggest that you are missing many things. The first verse of the song states: “I’m in a hurry to get things done Oh I rush and rush until life’s no fun All I really gotta do is live and die But I’m in a hurry and don’t know why.”   In today’s world being in a hurry can be equated with being busy.  We are busy because we are striving for greater self-esteem, wealth, possessions and property among other things.  But, in looking at my own life and those of my personal business coaching clients I see that excessive hurriedness because we are always busy is a distraction.  We rush and rush until life’s no fun.  And we don’t either recognize or know why our lives are no fun. Being continually busy never gives me...

  Tugboats and trains perform distinct and separate functions in real life.  Tugboats operate on water.  Their mission is to push, nudge and help direct the barges and large vessels that cannot turn very precisely in the confined areas of a harbor.  Trains are designed to pull and transport heavy loads over steel rails to a specific destination. In business, to be successful, you must have both the tugboat and train.  You need people who are tugboats.  And you need people who are trains.  As a personal business coach in Houston and The Woodlands, I have seen successful businesses. the necessity for both over a forty-year career in business. Let’s look first at the train people.  They set a course, they lay down the processes, tracks and they have a clear destination in mind.  They are usually meticulous and very process-oriented.  They want the most direct and shortest path to achieving their business goals. Tugboat people see the same g...

  With the advent of COVID 19, almost a year ago in the United States, there has been a transformation in how we look at ourselves, our relationships, work, and as a society in general.  Where pre-COVID we trafficked in a currency of confidence and a “can-do” attitude we now use the currency of fear.  Fear shuts down connections.  Fear shuts down conversations.  Fear shuts down moving forward.  Fear isolates us.  As social human beings this last one, isolation, is the one that has wreaked the most mental and emotional damage. Fear causes us to grieve.  We grieve because we have lost our sense of normal.  We may have lost loved ones, our jobs, or our homes.  Grief is the death of something.  And fear triggers grief because we have lost our sense of normal and at the same time, as we move forward day by day, we have no sense of certainty about the future.  In a way we are afraid to step out and move forward. Our fears are legitim...

What hat are you wearing when you think?  Years ago when I was studying what makes an effective team I came across a book, The Six Thinking Hats by Edward DeBono.  One of the premises was that for effective teamwork that it was important to have different perspectives.  And, as a team leader it is important to have a variety of prisms in thought in order to be able to move forward on a project or task with greater confidence. First, it is important to understand that each team member has preferred ways of thinking.  As a leader, you may be able to discern what is the best hat for someone to wear. 1. White Hat Thinking- With this thinking you focus on the data available. You analyze from past trends and extrapolate from historical data. 2. Red Hat Thinking-  You look at problems using your intuition, not reaction and emotion. Your goal is to understand others’ response intuitively, even if they don’t know your reasoning. 3. Black Hat Thinking-  You look for ...

  Ability is your capability in certain areas.  Motivation determines what you do with your ability.  Attitude determines the quality of your outcomes when you use your ability and are motivated. In my personal business coaching practice in The Woodlands and in Houston I have observed time and again the connection between these three areas and how they impact individual and team performance. Ability is important.  It is a great place to start when looking at what you are capable of accomplishing.  But it is not everything. Motivation, by itself, is not enough.  Motivation gets you going in using your ability, yet it doesn’t guaranty you are headed down the right path. Attitude is what takes your ability and motivation and keeps it on track.  Attitude says that if the track your ability and motivation are taking you on is not working, that you will try something else.  With the right attitude, you are willing to make the necessary adjustments on yo...

“Low self-esteem is like driving through life with your hand brake on.” — Maxwell Malt Do people possessing high self-esteem achieve greater success in life? You may have heard from many people that they want to increase their self esteem. They believe that once their confidence and self esteem is high, they’ll be able to achieve more and greater successes. While that’s a valid fact that high self esteem assists you in achieve all you want in your life, the mistake most of the people make is how they think about self-esteem. It’s not a thing to be increased or decreased! Instead, self esteem is the process of esteeming yourself. In other words, the process of boosting your self esteem starts with thinking of how valuable you are and treating yourself the same. Self Confidence is closely related to self esteem. It is an external behavior that stems from a high self esteem. Self confidence means believing in yourself that you can be effective in the world, feeling able to han...

In the previous three posts we have looked at the fear that is based on indifference, indecision and doubt. In this post we will look at worry. And, like the other fears, worry has a valid time and place. Yet, when you are consumed with worry it robs you of the energy and focus to accomplish what you have set out to do… As a business coach in The Woodlands and as a business coach in Houston I have seen worry take people off course and actually make things worse than the worry itself. In my businesses, when I started to hire people and had to make a payroll, I definitely had a great deal of worry. After all, cash flow in the beginning my businesses was not predictable. And sometimes it meant paying everyone except myself. In turn, that created another set of worries. Worry, like doubt is highly personal. In some ways it is easier to manage. Where doubt is about how we feel about ourselves at the core, worry, very often, comes from external circumstances, people and things. The poin...