Self Improvement Tips

  Do people possessing high self-esteem achieve greater success in life? You may have heard from many people that they want to increase their self esteem. They believe that once their confidence and self esteem is high, they’ll be able to achieve more and greater successes. While that’s a valid fact that high self esteem assists you in achieve all you want in your life, the mistake most of the people make is how they think about self-esteem. It’s not a thing to be increased or decreased! Instead, self esteem is the process of esteeming yourself. In other words, the process of boosting your self esteem starts with thinking of how valuable you are and treating yourself the same. Self Confidence is closely related to self esteem . It is an external behavior that stems from a high self esteem. Self confidence means believing in yourself that you can be effective in the world, feeling able to handle the challenges of the world to achieve goals. So,  how to build confidence and self...

  Washing machines help us clean dirty clothes.  Some of the clothes come out perfectly clean.  Others may still have the remnants of a stain that is now barely visible.  And then there are some clothes where the machine, no matter how you well it cleans, cannot remove the stain.  The stain remains visible to where you will decide to discard that piece of clothing. Washing machines are also a great metaphor for relationships.  All of us are imperfect.  We have dirt and stains that need to be cleaned up.  As with washing clothes, our relationships need repeated washings to keep them looking good to where they can perform as we need them to.  In my personal business coaching practice in The Woodlands business and personal relationships are very often dominate over the topics of sales, operations and profitability. Here’s the question:  How effective is your personal washing machine at two things?  Are you able to keep yourself clean a...

In the previous posts we looked at several factors that can keep your networking working.  In the last post we looked at the culture you bring into every encounter.  A large part of your culture revolves around what do you say when you talk to yourself. Your self-talk is critical to your success, let alone happiness.  Why is this important?  What you are saying to yourself on the inside will manifest itself in your words and actions on the outside.  Obviously, this will be a key determinant in achieving the goal of networking, to build deeper relationships. Over the years, since 2006 I have had the privilege of collaborating with many high- quality people.  They are all successful to one degree or another.  Yet, all of them feel they have hit an invisible ceiling.  My role goes from business coach to personal development business coach.  I am there to support them in discovering what it is or what factors are holding them back. W...

What hat are you wearing when you think?  Years ago when I was studying what makes an effective team I came across a book, The Six Thinking Hats by Edward DeBono.  One of the premises was that for effective teamwork that it was important to have different perspectives.  And, as a team leader it is important to have a variety of prisms in thought in order to be able to move forward on a project or task with greater confidence. First, it is important to understand that each team member has preferred ways of thinking.  As a leader, you may be able to discern what is the best hat for someone to wear. 1. White Hat Thinking- With this thinking you focus on the data available. You analyze from past trends and extrapolate from historical data. 2. Red Hat Thinking-  You look at problems using your intuition, not reaction and emotion. Your goal is to understand others’ response intuitively, even if they don’t know your reasoning. 3. Black Hat Thinking-  You look for ...

  As of today, November 17, 2020 the political climate is very unsettled in the United States.  The business owners I collaborate with in my business coaching practice in The Woodlands and Houston are moving forward.  But for each it is different.  Some are striding forward with confidence and a “we shall overcome” attitude.  Others are moving forward with less certainty.  In Texas, where I live and work, the economic situation because of the pandemic has been hurtful but overall, we are doing well. The question is, depending on who wins the election, what are the policies regarding COVID 19 and the economy moving forward.   In Texas, with a great emphasis on oil and gas there is a great deal of uncertainty.  Millions of lives and livelihoods could be affected over the next few years.  Employers and employees feel unsettled. And the business owners who are not in oil and gas feel unsettled, too.  One thing has become clear during th...

  All of us use our reasoning abilities to justify what we think and what we do.  We use our reasoning to solve problems and to embrace opportunities.  We use our reasoning in hundreds of areas. Yet, when we are in relationships and we give our reasons for doing something and the other party questions or disagrees with our reasoning, things can become very heated. In my personal business coaching practice in The Woodlands and Houston, I have clients who have the best systems, the best IT, the marketing, and they are profitable. Yet, and it will never be perfect, there are a number of hierarchical and peer relationships that are disjointed.  Disjointed relationships are a drain on productivity.  But since things are good for the bottom line, they are glossed over.  Then one day the tipping point is reached and there is an explosion.  An explosion that could have been prevented. And the explosion can be bad enough to halt productivity. What can you do ab...

In previous posts, we have looked at gratitude, happiness and serving others and how your self-talk can guide you in these areas.  Also, we have looked at an essential element of your mindset for successful networking.  You must focus on what you can control, which is you and your thoughts.  Do not focus on what you cannot control, which is others. Part of the control issue is that when we first network with someone there can be a tendency to have a “fixer upper attitude” or “I am here to help.”  While both of these may sound good, they actually can work against you and your goal of building deeper relationships through networking.  They imply to the person on the receiving end of your communication that somehow you are superior and that they are fortunate that you with your knowledge and insights without knowing anything about them can solve their problem.  In your self-talk with others remember that you are not there to fix anyone.  You are in ...